rant

went to test run the directors chair film with will this morning which is vicky cristina barcelona. i wanted to see it anyway but i was pleasantly surprised by just how good it was. i really enjoyed it, not really sure what made it so good. the narration was quite odd (a good point) and penelope cruz was mental (another good point).
conclusion?
vicky cristina barcelona was good.

i am in a horror of a mood. it's too hot today, everyone i asked about jobs said they do it online now so i came home rather than carrying on like i should have and looked on the internet for jobs and there are none. which means i have to go out with cv's again which is not fun. i'm so screwed if i don't get something soon.

i'm trying to sort some stuff on my website but that's being rubbish aswell. it's not adding a page. and it's doing it in the worst way possible. if a computer tells you somethings not working then fine, annoying but at least you know the computer is aware of you trying to do something. everytime i click 'add new page' it just directs me back to the main page and there is no new page and no reasoning for why this has happened.

trying to just think about the new flat but i'm not sure if will is going to want me in it at this rate. and i say his flat because i'm out of work in a week and will therefore be living off will if he manages to afford rent and everything else on his own.

i'm also hungry and i have no idea what to do for dinner.

and i ordered some plain canvas bags off ebay so i could make them pretty and sell them but they haven't turned up yet so i can't even distract myself with that and trick myself into thinking that it would make me enough money to not worry for a month or so about there not being any jobs.(even though in reality i probably won't sell any for ages)

rubbish

i'm also annoyed at packing. i don't have enough space in my room for all my stuff as it is. where am i supposed to keep the boxes full of stuff that has come out of the drawers? where?! exactly, there is no where for the boxes to go.

i wish something magic would happen that meant money wasn't a worry. i'm not being selfish either, all i want is enough for rent, bills, food, etc and a bit left over for art stuff. hence the worry. i wouldn't be complaining if i was poor like how people are 'poor' because they can't afford another outfit for another meal out followed by another night out drinking followed by another taxi home as a goodbye event ready for their departure on another holiday. just want enough that i don't end up evicted or in horrible debt. please?

anyway i'm going to stop whinging. i have an awesome flat to look forward to with my awesome will and it's awesomely close to the train station (because i'm being postive now and i will be able to afford to go to london just for fun soon). and just in general i am rather lucky even if right now is hugely daunting and crappy. and the supersizers eat the eighties is on tonight and that can only be good.


and the grades were released for semester b and i passed! i'm sticking with my 'i don't care what i get so long as i passed' by not telling anyone my grades because i really don't care. i have a degree! i have given myself a pat on the back. will passed everything too. i am proud of him. well done will.

don't know if it comes across very well but as an overview: i need a job. i haven't found a job. i'm panicking about money.

disclaimer: when i was whinging about 'poor' people i wasn't moaning about anyone in particular so don't get your knickers in a twist.